1st Track Critique Please

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EDIT

The final edit can be found here;

http://www.soundcloud.com/Rhythmersion/Apollo-1

All other links to WIP edits have been removed.

Original posts below.
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Hi All,

This is my first post, so … Hi!

I’ve made a few tracks with Renoise and uploaded one of them to SoundCloud here:

Link Removed

If you do listen to it then thank you.
Any critique will be welcomed.
Cheers.

I like your song! Don’t be afraid to give the kick more thump power. The melody is beautiful but has more space than bass. Engineers filter is great for filtering tracks I hope my feedbacks was useful. Cheers. BrainClaim

Thanks for the input and for taking the time to listen to the track, I appreciate it.

It was quite difficult to judge the bass as it was done with just a laptop and headphones but I have some decent speakers and an amp I need to setup, which will probably help.

I’m still finding my way round Renoise and haven’t seen the Engineers filter yet, so I’ll have a look at that, thanks.

Since you are beginner on Renoise, it is really great stuff! And for that you have my respect

Very kind of you, thanks very much.

I’m not a total beginner though, more of a novice, lol!

Thanks again.

Btw, I’m enjoying listening to some of your tracks… Very atmospheric!

Thanks! I am really pleased by your words

That lead distortion sounds very… Renoisey

Good job on your first Renoise track man. Onward to the next one Cheers!

That lead distortion sounds very… Renoisey
Good job on your first Renoise track man. Onward to the next one Cheers!

Thanks man! … Like the pun

As for the distortion, for some reason I had either too much or too little, I couldn’t seem to find a happy medium but I’ll take another look at it, now I’ve had a bit more time using Renoise.

Great program btw, I love it!!

I tweaked the lower end stuff a bit as well last night to get a bit more thump, I’ll upload it again once sorted.

I have a few others tracks I’m still finishing off, so I’ll upload them too soon.

Thanks again for the feedback.

Evening all!

Right I’ve uploaded a new version of the track here;

Link Removed - See first post

The kicks and bassnotes have been amplified and an extra kick put in on the busier parts, I’ve also dropped the distortion tone on the lead synth from 50% to 30% and tweaked the backing synth in various parts as well.

Not huge changes by any means but hopefully I’m heading in the right direction

TIA of listening

I admit when I heard your rising chord progression, I heard one of my awful leads http://www.filedropper.com/rhythmersion Relistening, I’d stick with your version sir

I’m interested to listen but I’m away from home for the day, so I’ll have a listen on the laptop when I get home tonight, cheers.

(Unless you can render it and upload it somewhere that’s reachable by smartphone?)

I admit when I heard your rising chord progression, I heard one of my awful leads http://www.filedropper.com/rhythmersion Relistening, I’d stick with your version sir

Whoa! That is quailty 4Tey… very Super Nintendo! B)

I’m loving the mashup !! … Thanks for sharing

I’m loving the mashup !! … Thanks for sharing

No trouble. Ah, that simple triangle lead sound I suppose will produce that ‘chippy’ feel I only used it because that is what I had on hand…and to keep the file size small. Glad you liked my mess around sir

I would add an EQ to your baseline track and add more base to it. And also good job on your first Renoise track. It has somewhat of an 80’s vibe.

I would add an EQ to your baseline track and add more base to it. And also good job on your first Renoise track. It has somewhat of an 80’s vibe.

Thanks, I’ll give that a go.

As for the 80’s vibe… Yea I hear it.
It’s perhaps something sub-conscious from my youth … Being an 80’s child an all.

The plan this weekend is to get those speakers and amp setup, as I’m still only using the laptop and headphones at the minute.

Hi there!

I listened roughly to the first version and then the 2nd version.

I like the kick more in the first version, it was more coherent in the volume. It’s a bit loud in some parts and a bit quiet in some other parts in the 2nd version. I like the sound of it though. Perhaps just experiment a bit more with the compression and EQ there… ?

You’ve tried different settings with the distorted lead, perhaps the settings is still a bit exaggerated (along with the chorus). Also it sounds like it’s in full stereo and the delay is more narrowed… I’d probably try the opposite; lead 50% stereo (try the stereo expander plug-in for this adjustment) and delay 100% stereo.

The whole thing comes of as a bit repetitive to me. Perhaps a 2nd chord progression would be in place at some parts, at least thinking of the current length. The melody seems also more like a backup-melody for a more melodic main-lead which never arrives.

Anyway, I like the mood and good job for being the first .xrns.A bit 80’s vibe perhaps, but that’s good!

Regards,
Another 80’s child

Hi, Thanks for the critique.

I think I best wait till I get the amp and speakers setup first before I tinker anymore with the track as I’m finding it quite difficult to judge some of the levels.

I added another kick to the chorus in the second version which is probably why its louder in those parts. Thanks for the idea with adjusting the EQ and compression, and with the stereo and delay as well I’ll take a look at all those.

As for being a bit repetitive, isn’t most dance music like that these days :lol: … I get that though and I respect your opinion, as you obviously know what your talking about. In regards to the melody, I think the track is probably more of a progressive style, hence why it just sort of builds all the way.

I don’t think the 80’s were too shabby for electronic dance music … UltraVox, The Human League, New Order for example to name a few.

Thanks again for the post.

Hi, Thanks for the critique.

I think I best wait till I get the amp and speakers setup first before I tinker anymore with the track as I’m finding it quite difficult to judge some of the levels.

I added another kick to the chorus in the second version which is probably why its louder in those parts. Thanks for the idea with adjusting the EQ and compression, and with the stereo and delay as well I’ll take a look at all those.

As for being a bit repetitive, isn’t most dance music like that these days :lol: … I get that though and I respect your opinion, as you obviously know what your talking about. In regards to the melody, I think the track is probably more of a progressive style, hence why it just sort of builds all the way.

I don’t think the 80’s weren’t too shabby for electronic dance music … UltraVox, The Human League, New Order for example to name a few.

Thanks again for the post.

Yeah with good monitors or headphones you’re gonna notice things easier of course!

I also respect that your intention was to create a repetitive tune, I was only listening with no genres in mind and just as a piece of music. But I guess there has to be some thought put into the progressions and build-up, even for repetitive songs? I didn’t care so much for this aspect this time I reviewed your song so no comments right now, but if you’re gonna make a 3rd version I’ll take that into account.

As for “nowadays music”, I’d prefer your song - even in its current state - over a lot of other songs so no worries there!

I agree regarding the 80’s, it was the best era of music IMO. I like the bands you brought up, New Order is one of my favourites!

Keep it up, and I’ll keep an eye on your music/this thread!

Hi again all,

Got another update of the track… version #3 :rolleyes:

Link Removed - See first post

I had chance to setup the amp and speakers last weekend and they really emphasised the issues mentioned in the previous posts.

Thanks again for all the pointers.

I’ve tried to use each bit of advice given to enhance the track in this version, its far from perfect but hopefully I’m heading in the right direction.