Mine’s GOTTA be this one:
#420839
: Omg theres this really hot girl at my school.
: Aww. Siegebear is in wuv.
:Everytime she smiles i wanna cum all over her face.
: Whoa
Jakefeb3: do you know a turtles only weakness?
AvatarOfSolusek: no
AvatarOfSolusek: well
AvatarOfSolusek: thier slowness
Jakefeb3: there weakness is they cant roll over when they are on their backs
AvatarOfSolusek: lol
Jakefeb3: now i have a plan
Jakefeb3: if i duck tape 2 turtles together they are unstoppable
<+kritical> christin: you need to learn how to figure out stuff yourself…
<+Christin1> how do i do that
LOL
sagosen, many praises. I thank you greatly…this has made my day!
Hehe, no probs, Sonus! 
This is a site everybody should know of, it’s awesome!!
Also, everytime anybody responds to these posts, type in an awesome quote, like THIS exellent “ouch”-comeback:
#81921
Aimee, well that’s your opinion, and I have my opinion about you. I don’t bring my opinion up, so I’d love it if in return you’d do the same, if only for common courtesy
I’d love to hear your opinion about me hon.
Perhaps you could write a book?
and name it “Things Aimee doesn’t care about, by Makat”
Chapter 1: Other people
CAN YOU SPEAK IN BM
wtf is bm?
BM MEANS BAHASA MALAYSIA
Does everyone yell in Malasyia?
ARE YOU GIRL OR MAN
a very girly man. you?
YOU FIRST
… that would make you a girl, then
I AM MAN
HEAR ME ROAR
WHAT YOU MENAS
It’s an american joke. Do you have jokes in malaysia?
YES.IN MALAYSIA HAVE MANY JOKE.
ARE YOU WANT CAME TO MALAYSIA
Are you offering hot malaysian sex?
WHAT YOU MEANS
Well, when a man and woman love each other very much, he sticks his woo woo into her waa waa. And in very special circumstances, if two men love each other very much, he will stick his woo woo into the other guy’s uh oh.
I CANOT LOVE NOW.I STILL STUDY
They’re always time for love!
ARE YOU STILL STUDY?
When I’m not love.
#1630 +(188)- [X]
(mc-face) don’t you think a funny joke gift would be kleenex that smells like ass
hehe
haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk
we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first
took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out
i looked around for pete and he must’ve chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh
What’d he say when he woke up this morning?
uhh… he hasn’t come home yet… i thought he was staying with you?
holy f****.
i fing hope im wrong about what im thinking right now
im fing going back to the beach to make sure
if he gets home, call me, i don’t want to be worrying about this
will do. you better hope he’s not still buried, you’ll be in deep shit.
quit: (DeadMansHand)
wtf? pete came home last night you f****. Ken’s going to be worrying about this shit all day
haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts
join: (PeteRepeat) (bob@3F8C4655.11D1C8C.18637D35.IP)
fing ken
ken… that fer buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot
pete, ken didn’t come back last night, i thought he was with you.
oh f****.
if ken shows up, make sure he doesn’t know that im at the beach digging for his body. i don’t want him to think i care or anything.
quit: (PeteRepeat)
rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach.
i can’t beleive how perfect their timing was
AWESOME!!!
This one’s good too:
#34329 +(72)-
how to make a directory?
mkdir
thanks
no problem, slut
err, zlut
Hehe, nice ones…
I don’t think it’s physically possible to both laugh and ejaculate at the same time.
But I plan on finding out.
- zetec is away - midget porn.
#418790 +(845)- [X]
i had 2 options
close the porn
or pull up my pants
that site is hillarious
big up for the link
That’s Seinfeld quality!
This one is really awesome:
AIM is like the ugly chick who gives SUCH good head, and works sooooooo well. MSN is like the typical hot blonde. Gorgeous, but you can’t communicate with her. Yahoo! is the creepy guy whacking off in the corner that no one likes, and Trillian is the average looking bisexual male.
True, true. I go for the blonde… 
why can’t alyssa milano live next door to me, be lonely and need the satisfaction and fullfillment that only a 20 year old computer programmer can provide…
- azathoth shakes his fist at god and goes back to his debugging
Don’t we all feel this way sometimes?
do you like psychiatry
my mom’s a psychiatrist
i dont
i used to think the brain was the most fascinating part of the body
but then i realized
pssssh
look whats telling me that
<@Tezza> ROFLOLWOALDFVGWKLDBNMKEB NEWNBCUNTBLINGLOJEVFFRILS
<+Franschie> Wow, somebody else figure the acronym out
rolling on the floor laughing out loud with only a large dick f****ing very grandly within kevin’s large, drunken buttocks nearly missing kevin’s eerie blood?
<@cky> lmao
<@cky> and the second part?
<@Tezza> LOL
never eaten wank, never been cum under, never took blowjobs - lying. into neverland goes laura, over jeff’s evil veranda! final fantasy really is loadsa shit.
<@cky> lol
<@Tezza> lmao
<@Tezza> Magic
For the famous “trance-is-gay-contest”
its so hard to create a build in an electro song without any percussion
no it isn’t
you puss
ok let me rephrase
its so hard to create a build in an electro song without any percussion and make it not sound gay
Another one:
Its like my Uncle Eric used to say, he’d say… “IU, lookit
the ass on that guy” To which I’d reply, “I’m not gay Eric”, and he’d say
“Oh yeah, sorry bout that” and we’d laugh and laugh. Then he’d try to
molest me.
#23396 +(12838)- [X]
<Donut[AFK]> HEY EURAKARTE
<Donut[AFK]> INSULT
RETORT
<Donut[AFK]> COUNTER-RETORT
QUESTIONING OF SEXUAL PREFERENCE
<Donut[AFK]> SUGGESTION TO SHUT THE f**** UP
NOTATION THAT YOU CREATE A VACUUM
<Donut[AFK]> RIPOSTE
<Donut[AFK]> ADDON RIPOSTE
COUNTER-RIPOSTE
<Donut[AFK]> COUNTER-COUNTER RIPOSTE
NONSENSICAL STATEMENT INVOLVING PLANKTON
<Miles_Prower> RESPONSE TO RANDOM STATEMENT AND THREAT TO BAN OPPOSING SIDES
WORDS OF PRAISE FOR FISHFOOD
<Miles_Prower> ACKNOWLEDGEMENT AND ACCEPTENCE OF TERMS
ROFL 
This is an extrapolation from a much longer quote… but I think the meaning is all here:
they show a big ass bowl of frosted flakes next to a waffle, a pancake, toast, a banana, a fin grapefruit… who the f eats a breakfast that big
<Flaming_Duck> not me
I don’t even EAT breakfast nomore
<Flaming_Duck> I mean, I eat when I get up
<Flaming_Duck> but the whole thought “BREAKFAST IS ONLY SERVED UNTIL SUCH AND SUCH TIME”
<FLaming_Suck> bitch, you make my fing sausage and egg sandwich when I pay you the fing money
<Flaming_Duck> don’t give me that shit
Awesome piece, I agree 
I am broken in two laughing every time I read the “NONSENSICAL STATEMENT INVOLVING PLANKTON” line…
LOL
#447190
<f|ywork> 1 of our students has got himself in a spot of bother. He booked out a dv cam and a firewire hard drive from the helpdesk, then videoed some chick giving him head and forgot to delete it from the hd when he returned it
do u have a copy of this video?
<f|ywork> it’s rendering in premiere as we speak
#281421 +(2137)- [X]
mdiym42: note to self
mdiym42: make sure your cat is not sleeping in the bass drum before you start playing them
true, true
#205408 +(2109)- [X]
The general rule on about people on IRC seems to be “Attractive, single, mentally stable: choose two”
[no comment necessary] 
#265968 +(2069)- [X]
<tom_0369> man
<tom_0369> im never moving to seatle washington
<tom_0369> i flew over it and it was raining and gray as f****
<tom_0369> it was depressing
when was this?
<tom_0369> flight simluator 2004
now back to work, damn it