a “print to fortune cookies” in the script terminal. the entire script is printed in two line per page increments with lotto numbers and a chinese word. this lady could be stuffing these cookies with useful bits of tools
I need achievements!
“BAD MIX achievement unlocked (Master clipped by 40db). You can now use the volume controls”
“ELEPHANT WHISPERER achievement unlocked (produced audible infrasound). You can now use octaves 2-9”
- Export a Pattern To Excel .XLS file format
hahahahaha fucking genius.
“this is your 1000th use of amen break you unlocked other samples”
“you played 4 chords in row you unlocked the piano roll”
“THE FIRST SHALL BE THE LAST achievement unlocked: an entire song with reversed samples!”
seriously though, some of this could be scripted, and would actually be kinda cool (funny at least)… i’ll think about this, but i’m very new to LUA.
maybe if people would provide some more good achievement ideas i will be more eager to start 
This ‘achievements’ crap could really spur creativity… I mean, it’s basically bite-sized compo’s, and compo’s often get people out of their comfort zone.
AGORAPHOBIC. You always run Renoise on startup, in fullscreen. Your samples are all Renoise Library.
ALICE DEE. You made Renoise transparent; you set your desktop wallpaper to Milkdrop 2.
BARISTA. All 100+ of your songs are <7 seconds long.
CLUB RITALIN. All 100+ of your songs are complete.
NEO. You wrote them and zipped them all by hand in VIM.
PRIDE OF FOXCONN. 24 hours work, no breaks.
WALL STREET. 700 GB song not saved yet and you’re using Windows 98.
+1 Achievements! LOL 
hehehehehe
i’ve been seriously thinking about scripting something like this, but it is pretty much undoable imo. you’d have to save stuff over different Renoise sessions etc and not sure how that would work.
Hold up, hold up! I have the badest of the bad idea of them all…
LIVE COMMENTATORS!
Every time you track you have a commentator commenting on your every move. “Oh, he put down a C-4 on row 25 with a Delay DSP while A-3 is still playing. I didn’t see that one coming!”
Some achievements:
FIRST NOTE - Pretty self explanatory.
MOOOO - More than 100 instances of cowbells in a song.
CRASH TEST DUMMY - Renoise crashes 5 times.
FILL 'ER UP - More than 90% notes in one pattern.
MILLI VANILLI - Have someone else make your song.
TUI - Track under the influence. A penalty fine will be sent to the developers bank-account.
FAST & FURIOUS - Make a complete 3mins+ song in under 5 mins.
Just to mention a few…
Please find attached the ListenHarder tool.
This tool is designed to let the user concentrate on the sound of their songs rather than how it looks.
Whatever this tool does, I hope it’s got a restore button. 
We most definitely need a DSP that goes ‘ping’ telling that the tracker (the person using the tracker) is still alive.
…or maybe, if the person using the tracker dies, automatically broadcast a tribute in a dedicated youtube channel 
‘Swordfish Mode’. the pattern matrix and file browser change into video windows playing hardcore pr0n. your boy/girlfriend comes into the room and starts orally stimulating you. if you do not make sufficient progress in your song within 5 minutes your entire file gets deleted.
copy a mono sample in the sample editor, convert it and paste it into the automation curve editor
A feature that disables your internet connection so you stop wasting time and start making music!
Oh wait, these were supposed to be bad ideas…
how about a feature that launches a browser anytime you press ‘space’, so you can go on the internet immediately while working on a song, so you will finally stop making music and start wasting your time?