The Freaky Grain - A Face For This Smile

Renoise Songs
1

Here a song which I composed with a friend. It is a classic song
with piano, cello, violine and harp.

You can download it here:
http://www.vereiser.de/Download/The%20Frea…his%20Smile.mp3

P.S. It is not finished cause we want to include a voice and a guitar too.
But I think, at this point some suggestions are welcome.

2

Sounds good. I think I might like it better without lyrics over it. But that’s just me…

3

I have added a new version. It is shorter than the old one.
With friends I completed the arrangement.
And I think the result is fine.
I replaced the harp by a guitar. Which is much better.

The instruments will be replaced by original instruments
some days

At the moment the song text and the lead voice is not existing.
So another version will come soon.

Next days I will correct some rhythms of the instruments.

Some criticism is very welcome in good or bad way. :walkman:

4

Hi Vereiser, I have enjoyed the song in a whole, but I have some criticisms regarding the arrangement:

first of all, I think you have tried to humanize the tempo a bit too much, resulting into a jumpy execution, while in contrast there seem to be much less attention in the dynamics, expecially for the strings; for example, look at how hard the background violins are from 1’27"; there is nothing wrong with them sounding loud if that was the intention, and the contrast with the other instruments is actually nice, but then, at 2’38", they suddenly disappear, leaving a big sense of void, which maybe was intended too, but left me unsatisfied.

with a better development of the violins and a general work of retouching, this could be really beautiful!

5

This seems to be a good adwise. I think, you’re right. The violine is important for the song.
So I will give the violine the chance to be the background all the time.
I know a guy which can play violine. :slight_smile:

I think, I have to work on quantization. The flow is a bit, yes, you said it: “humanized”. The guitar is not flowy enough.
In almost the same matter the piano, sometimes.

Thanx for your adwise. The next version will be released soon.