Kaneel is a hero. This topic should never been created. Made the whole thing a fucking drama, that the man himself never intended. The WHY behind it, is not our fucking business anyway. The music is still out there and in the end, that is what matters. It’s not like Kaneel is dead, just no present on this forum. Now someone destroy the topic and get on with it.
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Just what I was thinking. Very well said.
correct! so please, dont forget peeps like me who just checking by
to see feature discussions or updates.
just want to know whats happening on the renoise -dev front, everyday.
so in the first place no learning here, just see it as “waiting”.
and much respect to all renoisers for the many contributions especially from people like you, dblue, subset, suva, botb, and so on …
10x
I was wondering if anyone has Kaneel’s e-mail? I’d like to get in touch. Please send me a pm if you have it, thanks.
i tried.
EDIT: wtf… than stop posting.
Oh man I read all of this ages ago, come to think of it. I thought from the title he’d actually passed away! don’t do that!
Yes, It also scared me because I read his weird tweets yesterday.
Bump!
Whatever reason Kaneel has I’m sure he knows what he’s doing 
Godspeed!
Another “Why the lucky stiff”? 
I have no idea what you are asking here…
This sucks. I liked Kaneel. He taught me my first baby steps in renoise. He helped a lot of people with his videos.
He also helped me quit smoking!
I hope he likes where this new path takes him.
Hi dear fellow trackers.
It’s been 9 years, am I right?
A lot of stuff happened, I never got to explain why I wanted to leave but tonight, II am sharing my music with my “soon-to-be-8” lovely daughter and we’re bonding over how nice and girly (no offense, she said it first) my music was; I could start telling you all about when I was 16 (which was 20 years ago) and I started using trackers but it is definitely NOT the topic here, right? Why did I leave?
It’s quite obvious. I was mad at myself. I hated myself; I’ve put many efforts into crafting my own stuff and as many “untalented” ones it did not do much. This is what creation does to you, right? It Is normal, am I normal? I’ve been so preoccupied with “nailing it” I forgot that there was a real life outside and in this real life, there were actual people who cared about me.
A year after I left, a daughter came. It was not easy… but it was real life and it felt and still feels great.
Some years after, I moved to a different country to finally do what I always wanted to, to get the fuck out of France; yey.
Is it why I left the forum though? Is it because I wanted peace? Nah, fuck peace.
Is it because I wanted people to download my music? LOL YES TOTES not really actually (and if that was the case, FUCK OFF it did not work you lousy audience!)
I needed to chill the fuck out (SPOILER: I still do)
Do I Miss it tHe ScEnE?
Yes; it’s quite different right now.
Is it important?
Ask my daughter, eventually.
So, I guess I left the forum because I could not stand being a fucking failure as I put so much energy into something that only led to disappointment and frustration. Only now I realise it also made me exchange with so many amazing people in the world; no actually, I knew that from the start… but weirdly enough, as a masochist, I thought maybe I did not deserve that… yeah, hurt me baby.
Anyway, I was not sane and probably stil ain’t and I felt I had to come and you that.
Now I see the state of the Internet and I’m thinking “fuck, we had some good times”, cherish this!
Ps: Yesterday, my daughter had a talent show and she did not get a medal while she nailed the James Bond with an almost perfect routine, note-perfect, beats-perfect… the one who won did an out-of-tempo poor rendition of a pop song “by Rihanna”; I guess she has daddy’s talent at losing at compos and I’ve actually told her that I used to lose a LOT in my past.
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ps2: if mark is around, send me an email mate.
Hey man, good to see you around still. You were like the first friend I made in the scene all those years ago when we were starting out (DAS forever 
) Congrats on your daughter - hope things continue to get better and better.
- Libris/Skyscape
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Hey Kaneel…
You most likely nailed 99% about what matters in real life 
.
The actual point in care is that you focus upon the hundreds of opportunities you daily get offered.
Some of them are snake pits or simply don’t deliver the expectations you desire, but when you pick the right opportunity, it shall be satisfactory.
I would not teach my kid he would have “my loser skills” 
there are just a lot of experiences you have to gain in life of which many end up in so called “college tuitions” and some can lash out more nasty than others. They certainly don’t deliver in rewards but do make you aware and experienced in what your identity and desires are all about. No choice in life is poor if you learn from it, just keep focusing on the goals and things that matter, then you will become better skilled in choosing the right opportunities from the daily hundred and skipping those that do only end up in another “i could have known” disappointment.
Making your kid happy is about teaching it from your mistakes yet still allow them to make their own, without giving them the stamp of your failure. Evolution is all about progress. If you don’t want your kid to fail, then don’t start by saddling it up with your biased perspective of life, instead teach it to pick those opportunities you neglected whenever she faces the choice and asks for your advise.
Owh and hey: second best is still top three. The more contestants, the greater the admiration for that particular position😉
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Wow, of all the sceners… @Skyscape! I did not expect that at all ahahah, looooong time!
And sup @xerxes, hugs from London! (it does not rain as much as people say it does); it’s been a while too… last time we hugged was at evoke 2012 where I had to leave after a panic attack that had me believed I was going to die and ended up in a german hospital where they suspected I had taken drugs (long story short: I don’t take drugs, I just had a bad mix of too much coffee mixed with too much kolsh and I could not sleep and started to feel homesick)
And @vvoois, I definitely agree; I am trying my best to teach her to enjoy doing and learning things without caring about competitions and prizes, just to carry on improving while having fun. And also, to note down the names of the people she’ll have to take down later when she grows up (j/k :D)
Anyway, so good to hear from you guys! This is definitely what I meant by “cherish this”, we made things, and made friends; there’s a guy here (@Skyscape) I met twenty years ago as we were both starting to make music on our computers (and also, born the same year if I recall correctly); last year I met one of my old “internet associates” when I visited Montreal. All the connections we’ve made… (yes I’m going to be all emo, I know, still the same little girl inside), that’s probably what it was all about with this whole “making music” shenanigans 
Cheers , and good to hear you’re still alive
P.S. I noticed on the reaktor user library you downloaded some of my reaktor ensembles ( clone tonic )
You liked them ?
hey! yes! I’ve actually noticed your name! I did not try it for long (because, lazy/busy) but from my memory it was a good emulation of utonic! I love Reaktor but use it mainly for making synths on the fly