Schizophrenia Awareness

(img%) #41

satanic delirium my face was deformed in the mirror etc voice like torrents in the head not the panacee

(Zer0 Fly) #42

Yeah, sounds like similar stuff to what is going on in many psychotic minds. It seems to choose some kind of “faces” and then flood the consciousness with imagery and sounds and thoughts etc. I can perfectly imagine the crap taking the form of right wing stuff. Also it is possible to belive it be aliens, magicians, angels, demons, ghosts, scientists, superheroes, sinners and saints, everything is possible. It will choose whatever imagery can cause distress or fear in you, or when its enticing it will choose some form you desire, trust in, etc. I find imagery and methods are always tainted with some amount of sillyness, like it is always on the verge of being exaggerated etc. For me the very direct forms of harassment, threatening etc. using such images like police or nazis must have not worked very well, so it took more sublte forms and more time for messing with me…

There seem do be different pathways in the mind through which interaction can happen. It seems to well know and react about its victim, though given that fact of seemingly omniscience about myself, it seems to operate between very rigidly set boundaries of interaction. The pathways and boundaries seem to be a very individual thing for every person, just like the “stories” experienced. At least I always had the impression, that it is so, when I read other people’s reports. And some food for thought…maybe it isn’t about the bullying and brainwash to down you, but rather about, how you deal with it when you are presented with such situations. Maybe there are different outcomes possible, that to succumb, or also that to have strengthened awareness regarding the topics one was presented with.

Ya well, I do not know what would happen if you just let yourself go into the flow and with such instances like your right wing bullies. Maybe one then becomes one of those strange stone faces running around, having internalised the brainwash, serving it. I always had the impression though, that if people go with it there will be some vast paranoia and delusion explosion most probably leading to a forced stay in some psychatric hospital.

Yes the meds are very bad for the health. Must have to do with the industry producing them, there not being people who wish to relief suffering, but who wish to make as much money as possible out of the peoples suffering. But for me they transform the hallucinations and the perceived into something that does not overwhelm me too much. The docs are of different kinds in my experience…some cold ones will want to bomb you down with that shit, believing there should be no more mental anomalies in the person for every price. But there are also doctors who are more cooperative, and give their patients a listen, accept when symptoms are there as long as they are manageable, will say okay if you want to try lower dose medications for less side effect. But in the end those meds are everything they have, and everything they learned is how to find if someone is psychotic and then how to try through all the meds until it seems to work.

(LofiMat) #43

(Zer0 Fly) #44

Thank you, it is very good for me to practise ignoring paranoia.

There are also other helpful things when confronted with states of mind of mayhem. The mind is like a big cultivation, and you strengthen either unhelpful or helpful things by devoting your energy to them. Unhelpful things tend to suck up attention on their own, while helpful things tend to have to be achieved only after some means of willpower.

Helpful is to do something meaningful, trying to devote attention onto the one thing you are doing. In the rehab they use simple painting or handicraft, or gardening to achieve concentration on one thing. Physical or Craft work is also good. Interestingly meditation seems to have strong effect in this regard, but only after some time of dedication. I like walking meditation to free my mind for a while, but I seemed to have to go through quite some ugly psychotic barriers and traps before it started to work. Sometimes the breath needs to catch the fire that is going on with effort, before it can slowly calm it.

Also living in a tidy, cozy place, maintain body well, are helpful things. If you want to help someone who is suffering, help him with the effort, or rather help him learn doing himself again.

I found great use in cultivating any positive mindsets, positive towards life, other people, myself… Like it is no good idea to lie to oneself, but one can at least sometimes try to make a little change that one can believe in in that moment, and consecutively activate a change of personality over a period of time. I find shopping in supermarket is a nice place to cultivate it a bit. I try being easy with people, making my own mind easy as well. The secret is, the paranoia and bully stories don’t seem to be build well for such mind states, so they can run into the void again and again. Also negative behaviour will build up, you get back by the psychosis what you do to itself as well as to other people. I was for example once a liar and bragger, so my psychosis is going round and round about putting lies into my head and to impress me. I was fearful, so it burns the fear through my body until I loose it.


Sounds like the kind of abstract thoughts that come to people when they are just on the verge of falling asleep. Like the mind processing things in an abstract way, everything together as one thing. Memories, things you have seen, converstaions youve had, people you know all ‘as one’ in some kind of crazy mashed together form that is usually only supposed to be part of dreaming but made it into waking somehow. That kind of tiredness and dreaminess / nightmarishness might be something to do with not enough oxygen getting to the brain, or not enough blood getting to the brain in general…could be something like high caffeine drinks…starbucks, monster, redbull, dehydrating the whole body and making the blood like a thick syrup instead of something that can be pumped around by the heart easily. Anything that causes veins and arteries to open up a bit might get rid of it a little…like some have that problem, they smoke more weed and it goes away a bit (due to vasodilation effect of weed), but if they give up caffeine, drink more water instead of soda and stuff like that and most important do like 3 hours of quite fast walking everyday…it can go away more…
Another thing it might be is a problem in the spine from the ‘hunchback’ position of using a computer too much with no excerise. Maybe just whole body needs stretching, twisting…yoga or something, but really spending time with yoga quite hard postures.
Maybe its just too many years of tobacco…just low oxygen, blockages in the bloodflow, knots in the muscles, stuff like that maybe. Look at what happened to former heavyweight boxing world champion frank bruno…he was forced to take those meds after an argument with his wife and he said it fucked him up more than anything else made him like a half dead zombie. But the thing that got him through the problem the psychiatrists caused for him with those poisonous pills was just hardcore boxing training…skipping, hitting a punchbag…hardcore excerise long term.

(Zer0 Fly) #46

I stopped doing alcohol and tobacco altogether, it helps. Alcohol made pleasant daydreams out of the delusion, but I found them dull and deluding, and not worth the harm done. It gave me megalomanical tendencies that I had chosen better not to pursue further… Being sober seems to be the best state to cope with the problem. About MJ, could be relief for some people, I sometimes made experience of strong and unpleasant Illusion then, as if a punishment, not always though. But I guess everyone does different to pot and dosage also plays a role. Heard many stories of Ex-Psychotics smoking a bowl when coming out of hospital and being beamed right back into psychosis for good. Also Cannabidiol CBD is a hope for many diagnosed, as it seems to have potential to alleviate symptoms with much better side effects than the chem shit, am waiting for the day when it is prescribable here, studies seem to give good results. Yes, the usual medication should only be taken by people who seriously need it, its the chem bomb and ruined many lives with certain side effects.

I found that the whole psychosis thing seems to start with one having weird thoughts and attention dropouts, then paranoia starts. For some it starts with straight away with hearing voices though. Then the psychotic either gets lost in the paranoia, or, if he is able with reasoning or metacognition into circumventing and detecting the paranoia, it will oppose him with voices, imagery, general mindfuck, stronger delusion etc. And the problem is not what you see in such situations. The problem is what you aren’t aware of at the time the dreams come up, it is like you’re blinded, to reflecting thoughts and deeper perception of self. Weird dreams can get hold on you there. Such that you at times might believe insane stories you would otherwise never believe. Some get hooked on such a story, some get back and can retrospectively see their erring as such while not in a psychotic phase.


Yeah, I saw you can buy the Cannabidiol CBD, in little bottles from health food shops. I bought one, its basically hemp oil. I think it did something good for my gums and cleaned out my mouth a bit (im quite a heavy cigarrette smoker)…I felt just a tiny bit of ganja feeling (from drinking the whole bottle, swilling around my mouth like you would with mouthwash), it was only like one puff on a weak hash spliff. Also they are selling just straight buds with 0% THC now as well. It smells and smokes like real bud so that might be better to smoke than cigarrettes, might have some CBD calming or medical effect a little. It kind of annoyed me though because they took a good bud of nice weed, then just removed all the THC from it somehow. Kind of a waste. Its like decaffeinated tea…

I swear, drink more water, less caffeine drinks and sodas, eat less bacon and steaks…try stretching out a bit twisting, clicking your back and do some fun exercise like juggling with heavy juggling balls or hitting a punchbag for hours on end…might help.

(ffx) #48

I wouldn’t experiment with Cannabidiol, it is even stronger than a normal joint, easily to overdose. Also, if your brain obviously is more sensitive than others’ and gets in unbalance easily, Cannabis/THC is absolutely wrong idea. In reality it causes lot of psychosis. I know a lot of people using it, and not a single of them would be considered as psychological healthy. IMO instead better look into your body’s ability to heal yourself, so getting most sober and aware, good sleep, and a good life balance.

(joule) #49

If it’s low THC and high CBD, I wouldn’t worry a bit. CBD seems to be very non-detrimental.

(TheBellows) #50

has anyone ever overdosed on cbd? Or had any complications by using it ever? CBD is probably one of the least dangerous things you can put into your body.
If you have had a bad experience using cbd, then it was not cbd.

(ffx) #51

Oh ok, I get it wrong then. Did not even know there is a difference. My post was referring to THC. Sorry guys.

(TheBellows) #52

CBD actually makes THC less psychoactive, so if you smoke weed with 50/50% THC and CBD you would feel very little effect from the THC. CBD is known to reduce symptoms of epilepsy and anxiety. It increases appetite for patients on chemo and it relieves pain and reduces muscle spasms for people with neurological issues. CBD is also regarded as non toxic, gives you very little bad side effects and has no known negative effects to your body. It’s said to strenghten the immune system and it is being used to treat addictions.

In my country CBD is not allowed as a regular supplement and their only reason is the lack of research. A plant that has been cultivated by humans for at least 5k years, probably way longer, suddenly needs tons of research is just a load of bullshit. The pharmaceutical industry won’t do research on something that wont generate money, so instead we use shitty medicines that makes us more sick so we need more medicine.

(Zer0 Fly) #53

Yes I was referring to pure substance CBD. Like in capsules with 200-600mg each of the substance, so it will be dosed very high. It currently is in clinical trials for schizophrenia - previous trials showed good effect on half of patients, which is kind of like the established antipsychotics. Just with very little side effects in comparison…

I tried pure CBD in lower dose, and it is like it makes me very sober in a strong and relaxed way. It give a kind of “light rays” feeling. I also tried the dirty oil, and it indeed feels like very weak/bad pot additionally to the sobering effect, not like pure cbd, but is okay for me, too. I also smoked medical 1:1 thc/cbd pot, and then the cbd seems to drastically reduce the mindfuck and memory impairment of the thc. So you get kind of stoned, but not as strong and with clear mind. But then again, THC seems to be dangerous for many psychotic persons, triggering symptoms.

The CBD pot…with like ~0.2%thc and 10-20%cbd. It is not made by processing the weed like decaf. It is made by breeding the plants the way. Traditionally, hemp has different phenotypes like some plants have a lot thc and little cbd, some the other way round, some balanced. Breeding techniques can make a strain inherit these properties in stable ways. For potheads the stuff had been bred to have lots of thc, but by backcrossing with existing cbd phenotypes people achieved other ratios. Here in germany police raids on the stores selling the cbd buds have already started. Maybe it is because it looks like real weed, and the cops would fear that they mess with lots of people for something legal that cannot be distinguished from something legal. I doubt the stuff be any problem for anyone, other than ripped of people, who got sold cbd weed while they wanted strong stuff… If it were for me, they should just legalise weed altogether, worldwide, all the fuzz is not worth the trouble. I personally think prohibition is only going on because the mafia gets rich and can bribe cops and politicians so it can forever stay this way…

Also it seems people are trying a 3rd pathway of manipulating the brain to alleviate psychotic symptoms, something about the glutamate pathways and substances from broccoli sprouts…

(TheBellows) #54

how well has scare tactics and prohibition really worked? I’d say not at all.

(Zer0 Fly) #55

Yes I think so, too. Also Cannabis is not always like every Cannabis. There are so many different strains with different effects, and they all affect differently, also depending on dosage, harvest time, tolerance and individual responsiveness to the stuff. There’s rocket ship psychedelic stuff but also very mild stuff that barely feels like one beer and cause no paranoia. I know that many people get dragged down stoned by fat bowls or dap 24/7 and then they have no more energy for their living, and a few of them will become depressive or psychotic. But I have in my life met many people who have kind of responsible usage patterns compatible with the demands their life puts onto them. I do not think they do any harm to others, and not even to themselves.

I am watching with interest how a worldwide legalisation wave has started, and I wonder what momentum it will reach. Though its kinda weird to see stuff like in usa where marketing is rolling to design weed products around everydays life, I think the stuff should be handled with a little more respect.

(LofiMat) #56


Its difficult to make a prohibition fanatic understand when they have non-sensical arguments like “alchohol is not a drug” or “cannabis can never be medicinal”. If the same punishments were handed to them for white wine spritzers or whatever they drink, or even the more powerful drugs they take ( which they also claim are not drugs ) like xanax or fentanyl, oxycontin…the dramatic and childish ‘victimhood’ would be on display so fast.

Its weird how there has been medicinal heroin ( otherwise known as diamorphine ) for as long as anyone can remember, but they try to keep that part secret in the whole ‘no medicinal value’ argument.

Another thing that never even gets mentioned is ‘alchohol psychosis’…how many people get drunk and beat people up or do vandalism. Its considered a good laugh or normal to get super drunk, roll around on the floor throwing up, get in a fight and piss your pants on a saturday night…ive never heard anyone refer to that kind of behaviour as ‘psychotic’.

I guess if you sell alchohol you dont really want to refer to that state of mind as psychotic because it might affect your sales.

Maybe what they are really afraid of is that a lot of stoners have quite a questioning and skeptical state of mind, they might find things out that are supposed to be secret or accepted without questioning. For example, a lot of older people really believe that if someone is wearing a certain kind of clothing it means that person is definitely an authority and not to be questioned or challenged, but in more thoughtful states of mind they might be seen as just an arrogant prick in a dumb costume and their authority claims might mean nothing at all other than arrogance or foolishness.

On the other hand, if you ate nothing but strong skunky cookies for a fortnite or so I can understand someone might get paranoid or something.

If someone doesnt like it, they dont have to smoke it…but its wrong to punish people who do like it, especially if the argument that a person who does like it needs harsh punishments throughout their life comes from a drumk lager lout, football holliagan with no mind, or an arrogant sicophant ‘social climber’ trying to sound sophisticated and trample everyone else to get to the top of the pile. For those kinds of people, they really have no clue that they are the real ‘psychotics’.

(TheBellows) #58

The arrogant people who steps on anyones toes to get what they want aren’t psychotic, they’re psychopaths, two very different things.


Its true. Unfortunately, a lot of those psychopaths seem to seek out professions in which they can have power, control or ‘absolute authority’ over others…politicians, police, psychiatrists, prison guards, soldiers etc.

Its not to say that anyone in those professions is always a psychopath, but dangerous, arrogant people are most certainly amongst them.

Take the example of psychiatry. A lot of people died or were murdered by poisoning, electrocution or restraint holds by psychiatrists. You dont have to look far to find the evidence to back up that claim. Most of the time though, these kinds of crimes arent discovered and for those that do end up in court, the trials often end with ‘acted accordingly’.

-‘stabbed in the head by psychiatrists’-

If you look into historical cases you can find much, much more.
As for the future, doesnt look like it will be better…always looking for more and more control over peoples thoughts.

(TheBellows) #60

It happened here as well, nice things like drilling a hole in peoples heads to ‘cure’ them
Obviously some people has no problem with these sorts of things and that is a bit scary